In her book, Every Woman Needs a Wife, author Naleighna Kai packs a powerful, inspiring, and empowering message to women everywhere.
Even though the story is fictional and at the same time hilarious, it’s telling women to believe in who they are and that it matters not whether there’s a man in their life, it does not make them less of a woman.
The novel talks about marriage and infidelity and the length some men will go to cheat.
In the book, the wife decided that since she was paying for half of the affair she had some say in what should happen; she insisted that the outside woman move in with them and earn her keep in an honest way cooking, cleaning, and looking after the kids. And while this may not necessarily translate into reality, it had me thinking – What if.
Ladies, for centuries we have been superheroes, our grandmothers, aunts, mothers and now us. We have been giving of ourselves tirelessly for the upkeep of mankind, and yet during all that we have managed to make significant strides. But we tend to short change ourselves; as nurturers, we work ourselves to the bone taking care of everyone else, sometimes we even forget that we exist.
We end up sick, broken and hopeless with our hopes and dreams dashed in a corner, just so our husbands and our kids can pursue theirs.
Should we as women in these modern times be held to standards that existed centuries ago?
Times have changed and balance must exist in every area of our lives if we are to move forward progressively. According to the book, “women are bringing home the bacon, frying it, cleaning up after it, keeping the keep AND working a 9-to-5 and paying the bills, too.”
We are goddesses that can be whomever and do whatever we choose. We rock, we really do and it’s about time we embrace who we truly are.
In our society, we have been taught that little girls should be seen and not heard, so we cower and make ourselves small for our brothers, husbands, fathers and uncles to stand tall. It’s about time we end that rhetoric. Universities are now enrolling more female students than male students. And while our societies in the Caribbean, are yet to catch up with the more developed countries when it comes to women issues; a significant portion of women now hold senior leadership roles in many organisations.
As women, we have been conditioned to work against instead of supporting each other, but we can bridge that gap and form a sisterhood that connects, collaborates, love, respect and celebrate each other.
We need to focus on the things that will help to advance our lives; focus on what you want to achieve and who you want to become and then set things in motion to do just that.
Action is what creates the results we seek. What is your plan for your life? Most of what we want to accomplish involves the utility of money, do you have your finances firmly in place to take care of you?
It becomes imperative that as we move from stage to stage, we have a plan firmly in place that will support us. We have seen that advances in modern medicine enable us to live longer healthier lives, are you prepared for that longevity?
You are the artist of your life and you alone get to create the experiences and the memories, it is important that they be the ones you create and not what is created for you.
Personal financial planning is the most neglected subject in our education system, there’s no one to teach you, yet you must know how your money works. Take the time to educate yourself about money matters and investing – read books on the subject. There are countless free online courses on the subject; it does not matter what level you are at, you can learn to become a better manager of your money.
You are worthy of everything that’s good and successful, there’s nothing wrong with you, you have what it takes. Take steps that will bring prosperity into your life and as you move forward you would come to the realisation that you are more than enough.
Don’t shrink so that others can stand tall, you were created to be a success, use your success as a beacon for other women to follow. You can do this sister, I know you can.
(Judy McCutcheon is a partner in the firm Go Blue Inc, a Human Development Company. firstname.lastname@example.org)